So I thought I was being really nice to my cat on Tuesday, running to the shop, spending silly money on some motion activated ball in a tube - very technical - get him a catnip refillable toy, lots of nice food... get home produce these for him, turns around and walks out the room. Fair enough, he's a cat, he's an ungrateful fkkr! Seems very keen on showing me what's next door. Better take a look. Head next door. Glass and feathers and blood covering pretty much every surface in bedroom, a whole window pane smashed out... cat walks to a particular place in the room, shows me triumphantly beheaded pigeon. 
As I piece all the jigsaw together in my head I conclude that said pigeon flew straight through the window, not realising it was glass. I notice this because there is pieces of pigeon wing stuck the broken glass on the bed. As if that's not bad enough a day. Sht, I just flew threw a window and broke my wings. Oh god, what's that big black ball of fur? Oh…

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